Consulting Series Part 2-The Cost of Avoiding the Truth

The Cost of Avoiding the Truth 

Burnout, Bottlenecks, and the Leadership Lies We Tell Ourselves 

You can avoid the truth, but not its consequences. 

In my last piece, I talked about what customer success really looks like. It’s not a dashboard or department, but a practice of deep listening. And I asked a hard question: 

Are you brave enough to hear what your business is trying to tell you? 

Because if not, you’re already paying for it. 

And the invoice is showing up in all the places you don’t want it to. 

You Are Not the Solution (You Might Be the Obstacle) 

Let me tell you about the day I fired myself. 

It didn’t happen in one dramatic moment. It was the slow burn of realization after months of burnout and years of convincing myself I couldn’t afford help. 

I was the founder. I could do it all. Invoicing, operations, client relationships, management, strategy. I could do it… so I did. 

But I was exhausted. Inefficient. Invoicing alone would take me two weeks to complete. And clients? They took even longer to pay, if they paid at all. 

Hiring someone to take that off my plate felt impossible. I told myself I couldn’t justify the expense. 

The truth? I couldn’t justify the cost of not doing it. 

Eventually, I hired a trusted operational lead. My “CFO,” though I lovingly called her the animal wrangler. I was the animal. And I needed wrangling. 

She looked me in the eye one day and said, 
“Marnie, we don’t work for free.” 

That was my wake-up call. I realized that just because I could physically do something didn’t mean I should. That lesson — as obvious as it sounds — was buried under fear, control, pride, and the lie I kept repeating: I’ll just push through one more time. 

It wasn’t heroic. It was harmful. 

Span of Control (Or: The Bottleneck in Chief) 

Here’s another truth I learned the hard way: 

If everything has to go through you first, you’re not in control, you’re in the way. 

At one point in my career, I had to undergo surgery. Twice. In one month. 

And I didn’t tell most of my clients. 

Why? 
Because I was terrified they’d lose trust in the business if they knew I was unavailable. Not because they were unreasonable, but because I hadn’t built the business to function without me. 

That wasn’t leadership. That was insecurity masquerading as responsibility. 

If you're the only person who can respond, fix, follow up, approve, explain, and reassure… you're not a leader. You're a liability. 

The real test of leadership isn’t how much you can hold, it’s how well things run when you let go. 

Silence Is Expensive 

There’s another cost to avoidance that no one likes to admit: silence. 

When you skip the debrief because “everyone’s too busy.” 
When no one takes a deep look back to review why a client is upset. 
When mistakes are hidden because people are afraid of the fallout. 

You are not just tolerating dysfunction, you’re funding it. Read that again. You’re funding it. 

And worse: you’re training people not to speak up. 

I’ve seen brilliant staff members check out completely because their concerns were dismissed, ignored, or turned into performance problems. And I’ve seen good clients walk away because the apology came too late — or never at all. 

One rotten apple does spoil the bunch. 
But sometimes, the rot is in the culture, not just the person. 

Coming Up Next: Letting Go Without Losing Control 

Avoiding the truth is expensive. But so is trusting too blindly. 

In the next article, I’ll explore what happens when leaders finally let go but do it without a plan. When new systems are thrown in too fast, when ego hides inside “enthusiasm,” and when “just trust me” becomes the default leadership strategy, and even when that phrase is turned around on you, “you don’t trust me?!” shaming you for asking questions and holding people accountable.  

I’ll also share how I built a leadership triad, what we called the three-legged stool, and why letting go requires both trust and structure. 

Because true leadership isn’t about being in charge of everything. 
It’s about building something that works even when you’re not in the room. Stay With Us Discovery Form: Listening for What's Not Working